Hut, Hut, Haiku: Poetry Inspired by the NFL Draft

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Last year’s Poetry Enrichment for Players program (PEP) has been expanded to include fans. The draft was such a tease. Sunday rolled around, and there was no football in sight. To cope, I participated in the NFL’s Anti-Boredom Haiku Plan for Fans, part of the league’s strategy to make the offseason more interesting, and to support cultural initiatives in the community.

Fans, stop freaking out!
Your team will not have to play
without cornerbacks.

Gold carpet? Lion Babe?
Artsy player videos?
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

Steelers Holliman
TSA patdown describes
his tackling style.

Injured first round pick?
An excellent choice, Bengals!
(I’m a Steelers fan.)

They just signed Tebow
does anything the Eagles do
really matter now?

Did San Francisco
draft someone who might retire
after one season?

Will the Browns improve?
Does Cleveland ever draft well?
The answers are “no.”

It must be hard to
act happy when you’re drafted
by a crappy team.

Dallas, Randy Gregory
He just got a star tattoo.
What if he’s traded?

Crab legs: was it theft,
or part of the FSU
Football flex meal plan?