Eddie Lacy is so distraught about this week’s loss, he’s going on a hunger strike.
Peyton Manning is battling Plantar Fasciitis, which sounds like one of my Greek uncles.
Peyton’s really starting to look like he owns Papa John’s. He’s crusty, limp in the middle, and comes out after 30 minutes.
Turns out the best backup QB in the NFL is Ben Roethlisberger. He did more with one bad foot than Daniel Day-Lewis.
The Cowboys have lost seven straight. The Lone Star isn’t just a logo; it’s also a rating.
Washington destroyed what was left of New Orleans. Let’s call it the FEMA Bowl.
Adrian Peterson tied a record held by OJ Simpson. Hopefully he doesn’t try to beat all of OJ’s records. A couple of those are pretty grim.
Cam Newton says if you don’t like his dancing, don’t let him score. I told my wife the same thing.
Costaki Economopoulos is a noted comedian and prankster who came up with the NFL’s catch rules. You should follow him on Twitter.