Unlocking the Potential of Jazz in Sports

Anyone who knows me well knows of my love for statistical analysis and social experimentation. I have been significantly less vocal in my support of jazz music, a great genre that, much like the Utah Jazz, doesn’t have the popular appeal it deserves, boasts a tradition of racial diversity, and has not produced much of note since 1998. But, dear readers, I shall not be silent about jazz any longer, because a great man has compelled me to act. Clarkson University Professor Ali Boolani has made a discovery that combines sports, jazz, and controlled experiments in ways I never dreamed possible. I will allow Mr. Boolani, an esteemed scholar, pedagogue, and 2016 presidential candidate (fingers crossed), to tell you the rest:

That’s right, listening to jazz while golfing can improve your putting! Sure, the sample size was “small” and the trials were “limited,” but I don’t have to care about that. I was an English major! In all seriousness, though, the results of this limited study were intriguing enough to warrant further, more extensive studies on the relationship between jazz and golfing performance. If you’re more into anecdotal evidence, you can certainly give it a try the next time you hit the links.

But my question to Mr. Boolani is this: why stop with golf? Surely jazz has the potential to enhance athlete performance in other sports. It seems to me that tennis players, with their laser focus and expectation of complete silence during play, could benefit from the smooth, calming tones of Sun Ra:

I have plenty of thoughts on the interplay between jazz and basketball, but a man far wiser and more famous than I has already expressed them more eloquently than I ever could:

Side note: I applied to Clarkson even though I had no interest in going there. The application was free, and I wanted to “practice filling out an application” (17-year-old brains are not very smart). So, I missed out on being part of the greatest experiment in sports history. I guess I’ll just have to come up with something better. Who wants to shoot some free throws while wearing a fedora?