The Stadt Sheet: World Series Edition

With the Dodgers gone from the playoffs, so is superfan Larry King, also the only living person who saw the Cubs win a World Series.

What’s been holding the Cubs back all these years? Not having a DH or a good surgeon.

At this point, Cubs fans can’t help but wonder one thing: How badly would Harry Caray butcher the pronunciation of “Schwarber”?

Former Indian Kenny Lofton, who threw out the first pitch of Game 1, almost missed his flight to Cleveland. Albert Belle was going to go in his place, but the airline couldn’t handle all that baggage.

Cleveland pitcher Corey Kluber set a World Series record in Game 1 with eight strikeouts in the first three innings. His secret: imagining that every batter was Jason Heyward.

The governors of Ohio and Illinois wagered pizza and beer on the Series. Pete Rose then put 50 chili dogs on the Cubs. Frank Thomas called and raised.

Charlie Sheen, who starred in the Major League movies, wants to throw out the first pitch at a World Series game. He does know those white lines are chalk, right?


Keith Alberstadt is a comedian who is way more beloved than Joe Buck. You should follow him on Twitter.